The one page with no jokes. Almost.

Privacy Policy.

Last updated: October 13, 2026

Zero Pooches Given is a small personal website about Poochie, a dachshund, run by her owner ("Mom") in the United States. This page explains what the site collects, which is very little, and what happens to it.

What we collect

Only what you type into one of the two forms, and only when you choose to send it:

Fan mail form (Meet Poochie page): your name, an optional email address, and your message.
Work With Poochie form: your name, your email address, an optional brand or company name, and your message.

That is all. There are no accounts, no sign-ups, no newsletter, and nothing else to fill in.

How messages are delivered and used

When you press send, the site hands your message to SendGrid, an email delivery service, which emails it to one of our two mailboxes: fan mail goes to [email protected] and brand messages go to [email protected]. Both mailboxes are hosted by Google. Mom reads the messages. If you gave an email address, she may reply to it. Your details are used only to read and answer your message. They are never sold, shared with advertisers, or added to any list.

What is stored, and for how long

The website does not keep your messages. Nothing you type is saved on our server. Your message exists as an email: SendGrid keeps delivery records for a short time, and the email stays in our mailbox until Mom deletes it.

The site keeps one short line per form attempt: the date and time, which form was used, whether it was sent, and a scrambled version of your network address that cannot be turned back into the address. That line contains no name, no email, and no message, and it exists only to spot abuse.

Like almost every website, our web server and Cloudflare, the service that delivers the site, keep standard access logs: the network address a page was requested from, the page, the time, and the browser type. Our server deletes these after ten days. They are used only for security and troubleshooting.

Spam protection

The forms use a hidden field that only automated bots fill in, a timer, and a limit on how many messages one visitor can send in a short period. The limit works from a scrambled (hashed) version of your network address, the same one described above; it is not linked to your name or message and cannot be turned back into your address.

Cookies, analytics, and tracking

We don't intentionally set cookies, and we use no analytics, advertising, or tracking tools. Every font, picture, and video is served from our own site, so visiting does not contact any other company. Cloudflare, which delivers the site, may use a technical cookie for security on some requests under its own policy; it does not identify you to us. Poochie accepts all cookies, but that is a different kind of cookie.

The site links to TikTok. If you follow those links, TikTok's own privacy policy applies there.

Children

This website is for general audiences and is not directed to children under 13. We do not knowingly collect personal information from children under 13. If you are under 13, please ask a parent or guardian to send fan mail for you. If you believe a child has sent us personal information, email [email protected] and we will delete it.

Asking for deletion

To have a message you sent deleted from our mailboxes, email [email protected] from the address you used, or include the name and approximate date of the message. We will delete it from our mailboxes and confirm, as soon as we can and normally within 30 days. Please note that the services we rely on, such as SendGrid, Google, and Cloudflare, may keep limited delivery or security records for a time under their own privacy policies, which we cannot delete for you.

Changes

If this policy changes, the new version will appear on this page with a new date.

Contact

Questions about privacy: [email protected]. Mom answers. Poochie supervises.